White Continues Rewriting
Raptors' Record Book
January 8, 2010
Justin White continued to solidify his claim as the
greatest player in Bard basketball history,
shattering a pair of records and leaving opponents
slack-jawed with awestruck wonder.
White crossed the 1,500 point threshold this
week en route to a 31-point performance against
SUNY-Maritime, becoming just the second
player in Bard history to do so.
To put this in perspective, if each of White's
1,500 points were elephants, stacked atop one
another, it would represent a rough estimate of the
heights White's career has reached.
White also broke Demitrius Washington's all-time
record for three-point field goals made, and plans
to repeatedly break his own record in every
remaining game Bard plays this season.
The reverberations from White's record-breaking
are still being felt. In honor of his shooting from
downtown, Red Hook, NY is planning to name its
downtown area Whiteville, as soon as it builds a
downtown area.
Record books are also expected to be renamed
"Justin Whites", much as tissues became known as
"Kleenex".
And the NCAA will take up a proposal to make
every three-point line in the country white in
Justin's honor, since it is universally acknowledged
that he owns the area behind it.